Days 92 - 94 - First day back on 810kcals

On Friday I would have liked to be in a celebratory mood but I failed miserably. I had plenty to celebrate, it had been exactly 3 calendar months since I started CD and was the first day back on 810kcals per day for the week over Xmas but my sore throat had turned into an 'Oh my god I can't swallow' throat and I was feeling weak, run-down and sorry for myself. I really did feel like curling up under a duvet on the sofa all day and wallowing in self pity but I had way too much to do to prepare for the Solstice eve family dinner the following day.

The diet went completely to the wall that day too. It had originally started off with a rule bend/break of some battered cod but later that evening, after lots and lots of dashing about, supermarket shopping and things, I ate some chips reheated in the microwave! I don't know how it came to that because I'm not a chip fan anyway, and reheated chips are awful, but I somehow managed to enjoy them. I only had 2 CD sachets that day too I'm ashamed to say. If I'd had another when I got home maybe I could have avoided the chips.

That night, my throat got even worse and I only managed to get 3 hours of sleep before the pain of swallowing woke me up. As soon as I possibly could I went to a pharmacy and got some super strong throat numbing spray and luckily it really helped. After another dash around the supermarket with the boyfriend, I got on with the cooking for the solstice eve dinner. I cooked a huge joint of pork, some home-made chestnut, mushroom and millet stuffing (I made up the recipe on the fly, it turned out very well), roasted carrots and parsnips with rosemary and honey, roast sweet potatoes, some savoy cabbage and proper home-made gravy. My brother turned up early and helped me with some of the prep which really helped make the cooking easier for poor sickly me.

I went slightly nuts with the food but not completely out of control and I'm sort of semi proud of myself. I did have some of the stuffing because it was a made-up-as-I-went-along recipe and I couldn't feed it to anyone unless it was good. I had a small helping along with my well trimmed pork, savoy cabbage and gravy. I managed to resist the lure of the roasted root veggies and that was really difficult but I did it! However, I did weaken in the end and had some of the pork crackling and an extra helping of stuffing but I still steered clear of those sweet tasty roast vegetables!

After lots of clearing up, I finally got to bed around midnight on Saturday but woke up again a little after 4AM with terrible throat pain, coughing and gasping for breath. I did my best to get back to sleep but it wasn't happening and I ate a little of the leftover pork with some savoy cabbage and gravy which actually really helped and I managed to get back to sleep about 8ish. I woke up again around lunchtime feeling even worse, sprayed my throat and went back to sleep and woke again around 6PM to find a text message from my CDC asking if it was OK for him to move our meeting to Tuesday instead of Monday. I was quite pleased since I had spent the whole of that day sleeping already, I just hope I can get my sleeping pattern into some sort of control by then really. I eventually woke up enough to get up around 11PM, I pretty much slept for the whole day and I still don't feel any better.

As soon as it's a reasonable time in the morning, I'm going to have to cancel all my plans for tomorrow because I can't speak and I feel awful. I've also got no enthusiasm for the diet at all, I've been having all my water but I keep missing sachets and having extra food and blaming my illness. I'm going to do my best to reign it in on Monday otherwise my weigh-in on Tuesday is going to be pretty depressing.