Days 36 + 37 - First day on Sole Source

Yesterday was actually my first day on Sole Source but I messed it up horribly so it doesn't really count. I started the day feeling really positive and raring to go, I had to go out to work late morning so I had a soup sachet and a pint of water before I went out as I wasn't sure what kind of time I would be home again. I sensibly popped a soup sachet into my bag and took a litre bottle of water with me which I drunk half of while I was out. When I got back home, 4 hours later, I put the water bottle into the fridge and noticed that there were some frankfurters in there. I knew the pack had been open for a couple of days already and started thinking about whether they would still be edible when boyfriend got back after the weekend. Unfortunately, I let my mind dwell on the food way too long and in the end I talked myself into eating them with some buttered toast and mustard. I felt such a fool, I had been doing so well with SS+ and now I had potentially knocked myself out of ketosis on my first day on SS. I spent the whole afternoon and evening kicking myself for my stupidity and feeling really hungry too.

This morning, after a soup breakfast and plenty of water, I decided to do a Ketostix test to see what kind of damage I had done with yesterday's toast idiocy. I've been told it's not a good idea to do these tests first thing in the morning because I am likely to be dehydrated, so I waited until early afternoon. The indicator went a good bright pink immediately which means I'm definitely in ketosis! The result really helped me feel better about myself after yesterday's stupidity and helped reinforce my resolve to be a good dieter from now on. I just have to take this a day at a time, every day I stick to SS is a few more ounces of fat burned. As long as I look at every day I stick to it as a success and a step in the right direction instead of allowing myself to focus on feelings of deprivation, I know I can do this. And if sometimes I am desperate to feel hard done by, I can just remind myself that it is actually my fault I have this much weight to lose and I deserve a bit of deprivation for being such a greedy fool. There, I've got it covered from both angles, I'll be fine!

My afternoon ended up being a blur of housework, computer maintenance and a much needed catch-up session on my accounts and I completely forgot about lunch so I had a toffee and walnut mousse about 7pm. I'm very fond of the mix-a-mousse but I find it has a revolting after-taste, no matter how much or what I drink after eating it. This after-taste starts off as a sort of ashy flavour and develops into a slightly metallic or bloody taste. I'm quite sure the mix-a-mousse didn't have this weird after-taste the first couple of times I had it and if my brain is not deceiving me, the taste is getting slightly stronger each time, it's quite unpleasant and a little off-putting but I still plan to get more next time I see my CDC.

So it's after 8pm now and I've still got one more sachet to get through today and because I only had my last one about an hour ago, I can treat myself to a lovely hot chocolate closer to bed-time, or perhaps a hot vanilla with a little cinnamon and nutmeg. mmmmmmm.....